How do parents support a child over a longer period when it comes to cannabis?

Support around cannabis rarely lasts a few weeks. Many parents experience phases in which things go better and phases in which a setback calls everything into question again. Anyone supporting a child over a longer period therefore needs a reliable stance more than a perfect plan. This means staying interested, keeping clear rules, reacting calmly and getting help when everyday life alone is not enough.

Why a long-term view matters

The federal prevention programme says that how harmful cannabis is depends on the age of the user and how often they use it. Young people in particular are at especially high risk. For parents, this means that a single abnormality is not enough to assess the situation. What matters is how behaviour changes over months, whether school, friendships and interests suffer, and whether the child reaches for cannabis more often.

This also includes the brain. According to the BIÖG, the young brain is in an important phase of development, and THC disrupts the maturation processes. Anyone who knows these connections can classify changes better and does not have to treat every mood swing as either a catastrophe or a trivial matter.

A conversation rhythm made of many short moments

Many parents plan one big conversation and are disappointed when nothing changes afterwards. Short, regular occasions for talking work better: at mealtimes, on the way to school, in the car. This is less about cannabis than about what your child is currently preoccupied with. As trust grows, the subject of use comes up more often on its own.

The federal recommendations for parents rely on listening and showing interest. Anyone who asks questions hears more than someone who judges straight away. Hold back from moral lectures and avoid sweeping judgements. A child who feels judged tells you less, and that is exactly when you lack the information you need.

Clear rules that are kept

Supporting a child does not mean allowing everything. The federal recommendations name a consistent and clear stance as the foundation. It makes sense to agree on goals together and write them down. Ask your child what they need, and what they need in order to reach the goal. A rule that you have both helped to shape is easier to keep than one announced in an argument.

• Few rules that you can really monitor
• Consequences that are known in advance and fit the behaviour
• Fixed times for conversations about school and free time
• One goal that you review together

The BIÖG also comments on consequences. The home should be a cannabis-free zone. As an example, it names reducing pocket money if it is used to buy cannabis products. Physical violence and threats strain the relationship and make the situation worse, so they have no place as consequences. Parents should highlight positive changes, and on the way to stopping, it is also a success if the child uses less.

The legal position under the Cannabis Act (KCanG) is an anchor. It prohibits use in the immediate presence of people under 18. Cannabis may not be possessed or acquired by minors, and plants and products must be secured so that minors have no access. You do not have to renegotiate these rules constantly, as they are the foundation.

When a setback comes

Setbacks are part of it. If your child uses again after a good phase, a matter-of-fact approach helps more than outrage. Ask what happened, which situation led to it and what would help next. Keep the door open, even if you are disappointed. What matters is that your child knows they can talk to you after a setback.

Withdrawal symptoms can also play a role. According to drugcom's frequently asked questions, they usually begin 24 to 48 hours after the last use and generally last up to a week, at most 14 days. Another drugcom article mentions around three to four weeks until withdrawal is largely over. Their intensity varies greatly from person to person. If sleep problems or restlessness persist, that is a reason to speak with a counselling service or a doctor.

Parents also need support

Long-term support takes strength. Many parents feel guilty, overwhelmed or alone. That is understandable, but it is no sign that you are failing. According to the Niedersächsische Landesstelle für Suchtfragen (NLS), addiction counselling services are also a point of contact for relatives. The Sucht & Drogen Hotline can be reached on 01806 313031. The Elterntelefon (parent phone line) of Nummer gegen Kummer has the number 0800 111 0 550 and is anonymous and free of charge.

Plan small breaks, talk with other adults who relieve you, and accept help when it is offered. Support that you can sustain over months is more effective than support that leaves you exhausted after three weeks.

What you can do in the coming months

• Set a fixed weekly time for a calm conversation.
• Note changes in school, sleep, friendship circle and mood.
• Review the rules together every few weeks and adjust them.
• Find a counselling service before you need one.
• Speak with the school if it notices signs.

Good support rarely shows up as one big breakthrough. It shows in your child knowing they can talk to you. How a conversation begins is explained in the guide under How do parents raise the topic of cannabis properly?. What builds trust is shown in How do I build trust so my child opens up?. For family rules, Which rules make sense for families with cannabis? is worth reading.

If you are looking for a service for further support, Where can parents get advice on cannabis? is a good starting point. Further guidance on prevention is available in the prevention and youth protection topic area.