Which rules make sense for families with cannabis?

Sensible family rules are few and clear, follow the law and are understandable for children. They include no use in the presence of children, no passing on to third parties, and storage that children cannot reach. Rules for friends, for journeys and for when something goes wrong are added.

Why rules give orientation

Children need reliable boundaries, even when they often resist them. A rule that is explained and always applies removes room for negotiation and dispute. Whoever decides every question anew overwhelms both the child and themselves. It therefore makes sense to set rules in advance before any conflict arises.

The legal framework

Part of the family rules is set by the Cannabis Act (KCanG). The most important points:

• Persons aged 18 and over may possess cannabis for personal use within a limit of 25 grams (section 3(1) KCanG).
• Private home cultivation is permitted for persons aged 18 and over, for no more than three cannabis plants at the same time in total (section 9(1) KCanG).
• Cannabis from private home cultivation may not be passed on to third parties (section 9(2) KCanG).
• Consumption in the immediate presence of under-18s is prohibited (section 5(1) KCanG).

These points form the basis. Family rules can make them more specific, but they cannot override them. Cannabis and propagation material must be protected at the place of residence by suitable measures and safety precautions against access by third parties, in particular children and young people (section 10 KCanG). For cannabis associations (Anbauvereinigungen), the law expressly requires protection against unauthorised access, above all by children and young people (section 22(1) KCanG).

Rule 1: no use in the presence of children

The most important rule concerns the immediate surroundings. Consumption in the immediate presence of under-18s is prohibited under section 5(1) KCanG. For the family this means that children should not witness use. How far “immediate presence” extends in an individual case is for authorities and courts to decide. Word the rule carefully and concretely. The BIÖG also advises declaring the home a cannabis-free zone.

Rule 2: storage out of reach

Cannabis and home cultivation belong in an area that is inaccessible to children. The rule also covers equipment and plants. Anyone with plants in the garden or on the balcony should agree together how access is secured and who has the key. A rule of this kind makes sense regardless of whether a child has shown interest so far.

Rule 3: no passing on to friends

The law prohibits passing on cannabis from private home cultivation to third parties (section 9(2) KCanG). Anyone who gives or passes on cannabis to minors commits a criminal offence (section 34(1) no. 7 KCanG). For a person over 21, a particularly serious case is generally present (section 34(3) KCanG). For families this means that friends of the child must not take anything out of the household either. Everyone in the household should know this rule, including grandparents or babysitters.

Rule 4: use and traffic

A rule on road traffic is needed at the latest when a child gets its driving licence. For car journeys the following limits apply: 0.5 per mille blood alcohol (section 24a(1) of the Road Traffic Act (StVG)) and 3.5 nanograms of THC per millilitre of blood serum (section 24a(1a) StVG). Anyone who drives with 3.5 nanograms of THC or more and also drinks alcohol commits a separate administrative offence (section 24a(2a) StVG). According to the BIÖG, there is a complete ban on cannabis in road traffic for under-21s and during the probationary period. The family rule is therefore: whoever has used does not drive, and whoever is due to drive is never offered use by anyone.

Rule 5: calling without fear of punishment

Perhaps the most important rule protects children: they can call you when they are in a situation they cannot solve alone. That includes rides with a drunk or stoned driver, problems with friends, or a situation in which they can no longer respond. What matters is that in that moment you help first and have the conversation later.

How rules become reliable

• Few rules: Five clear points work better than twenty that nobody remembers.
• Explain: Tell the child why the rule applies. The prevention page stresses that the young brain is still developing and that cannabis is risky there.
• Work out together: Anyone who had a say in a rule usually understands it better and can explain it more easily.
• Name consequences in advance: What happens if a rule is broken should be set in advance and not decided in anger. According to the BIÖG, physical violence and threats are not suitable consequences.
• Review: Sit down together after a few weeks and check whether the rules fit everyday life.

Typical mistakes

Family rules often fail for three reasons. First, there are too many rules that nobody keeps. Second, the rules keep shifting, so the child does not know where it stands. Third, rules come without explanation and are experienced by the child as a pure question of power. Each of these mistakes can be avoided through a shared conversation.

Visits, parties and sleepovers

Rules for visitors are often the hardest in family life. Agree who may be in the house at parties, from what age sleepovers are allowed, and which contact details the parents of friends know. If adults bring cannabis as guests, the same rule on use in the presence of children applies to them. This should be discussed in advance so that nobody is surprised.

At parties with alcohol, the agreement about driving remains a central point. A child who has to be collected in the evening should have a number it can call without fearing reproaches.

What you can do now

1. Write the rules down together, with the legal points as the framework.
2. Explain each rule in one sentence that suits the child's age.
3. Set the consequences before the first breach happens.
4. Agree the rules with other adults in the child's environment, such as grandparents.
5. Review the rules after a few weeks and adjust them.

How to align the parents' stance is shown in the article Should parents agree on cannabis? The legal basics of youth protection are explained in the overview under Youth protection. For questions about upbringing, the Elterntelefon of Nummer gegen Kummer can be reached on 0800 111 0 550.