Can money problems point to cannabis use?

Can money problems point to cannabis use? On their own they say little. Together with other conspicuous signs they can be one piece of the overall picture, but they prove nothing. If a child or young person is constantly short of money, money disappears or unexplained expenses appear, a closer look is worthwhile. Parents should not judge too quickly, though. This article shows how to classify warning signs, how to lead the conversation and where to find counselling.

A hint that proves nothing

Money problems have many causes. A young person may spend more on leisure, clothing, a phone or outings than its pocket money covers. Friends, group activities or school costs also play a role. Anyone who looks only at the money quickly suspects wrongly.

If money problems appear together with other conspicuous signs, however, the situation changes. Then it is sensible to look more closely.

What specialist services understand by problems

Drugcom describes dependence with a list of criteria. According to this source, dependence is present when at least two criteria apply within twelve months. Problematic use often begins earlier. What matters, according to specialist services, is whether use has already led to negative consequences.

Negative consequences can look very different in everyday life. The BIÖG names as typical signs of addiction, for example, suddenly worse performance, frequent absence, changes in the circle of friends, giving up hobbies, mood swings and withdrawal. According to drugcom, the amount or frequency of use alone does not show whether there is a problem.

Seeing warning signs in context

A single warning sign rarely suffices for a judgement. Look at the overall picture: has the behaviour changed over weeks? Is there withdrawal, declining performance, changing moods or new circles of friends? Money problems gain weight when they fit in with these.

It is also important to notice strengths and interests. A child who still does sport, keeps up friendships and talks at home shows a different situation from one who withdraws completely.

Having the conversation

A conversation about money can easily turn into an accusation. Begin with an open question and avoid insinuations. Say what you observe, and ask how the person sees the situation. A sentence such as “I have noticed that you are spending more money” is more concrete and less hurtful than an accusation.

Give the conversation time. If the child does not answer immediately, do not press. Leave the question open and come back to it later. Trust grows when parents listen.

Making pocket money and spending transparent

A clear agreement helps in everyday life. Agree together what the pocket money is for and how larger expenses are discussed. Whoever makes spending traceable takes the sharpness out of the money topic.

If money is missing and the explanation remains unclear, a conversation about the reasons is more important than any control. A check without agreement can damage trust. According to the BIÖG, one possible consequence is to cut pocket money if a child uses it to buy cannabis products. According to the BIÖG, physical violence and threats are not a suitable consequence.

When to seek counselling

If you are unsure whether the use is problematic, counselling helps. The Elterntelefon of Nummer gegen Kummer can be reached on 0800 111 0 550. It advises parents anonymously and free of charge on questions about their child.

If the use itself seems very stressful or the person endangers themselves, a local addiction counselling centre is the next step. The Sucht & Drogen Hotline on 01806 313031 can also help; it charges a fee.

Prevention in the family

Clear family rules, open conversations and interest in the child's everyday life work preventively. Those who keep leisure, self-esteem and contacts in view strengthen protective factors. Young people in particular need contact persons who do not condemn at once.

The law also sets a framework. Under section 5 of the Cannabis Act (KCanG), consumption in the immediate presence of minors is prohibited, and section 34 KCanG punishes passing cannabis on to children and young people.

When a conversation alone is not enough

If you have the impression that the child endangers itself, a conversation alone is often not enough. Then counselling is the right step, and it should happen as soon as possible. An appointment at an addiction counselling centre helps to assess the situation together. Parents do not have to cope with this alone.

Your own role as a parent

Parents are role models, including in how they handle money and use. Anyone who consumes a lot themselves, or openly argues about money, influences the child's situation. An honest look at your own habits is therefore part of the conversation.

Small steps that help

• Talk briefly each week about spending, without blame.
• Think together about which wishes the child can fulfil with its own money.
• Make clear agreements about when money is given and when it is not.

Further reading: How can parents tell that their child is using cannabis?, Which rules make sense for families with cannabis? and Which warning signs show that use is getting out of hand? An overview is under Prevention and youth protection.

What you can do now

• Observe the overall picture over a longer period and do not focus on the money alone.
• Hold a calm, open conversation without interrogation.
• Agree rules together for pocket money and larger expenses.
• Get counselling via the Elterntelefon on 0800 111 0 550 if you are unsure.